The Horrors of Banjo-Kazooie

Image by Flickr User: Justin Taylor

Banjo-Kazooie is a bright and sunny game, we all know that, we all accept that. However, upon closer inspection I’ve realized the game could (maybe should) have been terrifying to those of us who played it as young children. It’s all there, and out of the game’s sunny context, all so very creepy!

Living Killer Ice Cubes with Googly-Eyes!

Those eyes, always staring straight ahead. Unblinking, unfazed by the pained whimpers of the creatures it crushes under its icy mass. Don’t look too deeply into those eyes, else you be left just as cold and broken as each of its victims.

A Giant Rusting Metal Shark With Razor-Sharp Innards!

The perfect machine for disposing of anything its dark master considers trash. It’s insides a festering mass of tainted water and spiraling death. How long until this mechanized hunter embraces its true nature as a hulking mass of death?

Body-Slamming Grave Stones!

Visiting a graveyard is creepy. Visiting a graveyard at night is scary. Visiting a graveyard at night where the graves themselves are trying to put you into the ground…nope. Just, just nope.

Getting Flushed Down A Rusty Old Toilet!

The one place that absolutely no one, be they kid or adult would ever want to find themselves. Forced into the bowels of a forgotten septic tank. That image alone, ugh I can’t stand to think of it!

Deep-Voiced Pots that Feed on Eggs!

Thaaaaaaank Yooooouuuuu…..That is all…

It’s a wonder our fragile child minds were able to handle the level of potential terror that this game confronted us with. Oddly enough those deep voiced flower pots haunt me even now…There’s just something so…wrong about them!

Banjo-Tooie had even more creepy stuff, that shouldn’t even be mentioned…but why not mention your favorites down below (unless of course the dread the very thought of them would evoke would be so great as to prevent you from typing…)

8 Comments

  1. duckofindeed says:

    For the longest time, I thought those pots were saying, “Voooooodkaaaaa!” “Thank you” makes a lot more sense.

    And the most terrifying part of this game is the inside of the Rusty Bucket, you know, the huge room with the bottomless pit (how in the Isle o’ Hags can there be a bottomless pit on a boat?) and all the moving parts ready to push you off or make you lose your footing so that you fall…into the inexplicable bottomless pit. Though, swimming down to the bottom of Clanker’s chain to set him free was pretty stressful, too. I drowned so many times down there.

    And you know what seriously freaks me out is this one portrait in Mad Monster Mansion, in the dining room, that looks like a picture of Mumbo. That seriously always creeped me out because he looks really freakish in it, and I always wondered, does it look creepy because the graphics simply aren’t good, and the image is a little distorted, or is there an evil doppelganger of Mumbo out there somewhere…. (Well, I suppose there was in “Banjo-Tooie”…) Freaks me out to this day.

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    1. Hatm0nster says:

      I don’t remember that Mumbo portrait, the image must have been too much to deal with and got subconsciously suppressed. 🙂

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  2. Dragoncorn says:

    I am glad I played this when I got older 😉

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    1. Hatm0nster says:

      You are fortunate indeed! No Banjo-Nightmare for you eh? 😀

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      1. Dragoncorn says:

        Yep, all I have are good dreams about it, not nightmares. Dat music doh!

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  3. Matt says:

    I played Banjo-Kazooie when I was 8, and both Clanker and Mad Monster Mansion freaked me out!! It is amazing how, on the latter, Rare was able to create a truly creepy environment on a generally colorful game.

    The same thing could be said about Gruntilda’s Lair. That thing was so big and cavernous.

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    1. Hatm0nster says:

      Oh yeah Gruntilda’s Lair. The giant gruntilda effigy and spider rooms were especially chilling rooms…though maybe not the most chilling.

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